Sunday, February 24, 2013

a very useful manual for lusty new lovers Ways to keep your sex life in top form

People from the UK are enjoying a thriving sex-life well into their sixties, a survey has shown.

According to a report published by Age UK, a quarter of over-65s claimed that their love life hasn't changed despite their age, and 8 per cent of the same age group are keen to embark on a new sexual relationship, the Independent reported.

A total of 2,000 over 65-year-olds were surveyed, out of which 12 per cent said that they would like to try out new things with their partners.

Meanwhile, 18 per cent of women and 27 per cent of men said that they would like to be more sexually active.

More than 25 per cent said that they couldn't talk to their partners about sex and only 17 per cent felt comfortable talking to health workers.

Did he pop the question on V-Day? From getting the kisses right to fixing the meals, here's a handy guide for lusty new lovers

Looking for ways to add some spice to your sex life? Here are a few tips to entice your woman...

MORE than 50 years have passed, but retiree K.S. Lim still remembers the first time he saw Malaysia's Queen of Striptease, Rose Chan, perform.
It was in the mid-1950s when Lim caught the first show by Chan, who was in her 20s, in Batu Gajah, Perak.
"I was 18 years old when I saw her perform at a cinema in Batu Gajah," he said.
Lim, 71, said he had joined his elder brother and several friends on that outing.
"Curiosity got the better of me and I decided to join them to check out for myself what was the big deal about Chan as I had heard so much about her."
His interest was piqued as Chan, a cabaret dancer turned striptease queen, was purportedly able to perform "outrageous" stunts.
"I decided to check out for myself whether what I heard was true," he said.
Chan and her troupe, said Lim, would normally perform in small towns like Batu Gajah, Pusing, Tanjung Tualang and Tronoh.
"This was because enforcement in these areas was not so strict," he claimed, adding that Chan would perform in an area for only five days.
"After the five days, she would move on to other places," he said.
At that time, the ticket to Chan's show cost five dollars.
"Mind you, five dollars was considered a huge amount then," said the grandfather of two.
The steep price did not deter her legions of adoring "fans" from coming back day after day. Some went for as many as three shows a day.
"The earliest show was usually at 7pm and each show could last for two hours," he said, noting that each time Chan performed, the venue would be packed to the brim.
Those under 18 were barred from viewing Chan's performances due to the nature of her shows.
A typical show by Chan, Lim added, would start with her singing and dancing.
"As the night dragged on, she would slowly strip and perform lewd, outrageous and dangerous acts," he revealed.
She was also known to wrestle with pythons on stage.
Lim said Chan truly lived up to her Striptease Queen tagline. As such, members of the audience would usually wait with bated breath for the finale of her performance.
Lim recalled how Chan once invited her audience up on stage. "She dangled cash of RM1,000 to anyone who was willing to join her.
"There were, however, no takers as the men were afraid of being injured," he quipped.
Looking back, Lim said Chan was ahead of her time.
"She awed spectators with her outrageous performances," he said.
Despite her name, life was anything but a bed of roses for Rose Chan.
According to Wikipedia, Chan was born Chan Wai Chang in Soochow, China in 1925 to acrobat parents and was brought to Kuala Lumpur in 1931, at the age of 6, by her adoptive mother.
She had no formal education, save for eight months of schooling at the age of 12. She then worked in a button-making shop, earning six gantang of rice and one loaf of cornbread a month plus 12 cents per thousand buttons and later made mosquito nets from which she earned a lit bit more.
When she was 16, her adoptive mother arranged her marriage to an elderly Chinese Singaporean harbour contractor as his fourth wife.
Her marriage, however, broke up after a few months, when her husband got fed up with her adoptive mother's constant request for S$1,000-$2,000 each time.
He sent Chan back to Kuala Lumpur and gave her S$600 a month, on condition that her adoptive mother got her a servant to do the housework. The mother, however, pocketed the money. One day, when her husband dropped by the house on his way to the Penang races, he saw Chan doing housework. Angered, he not only stopped sending money, but stopped seeing her entirely.
With her allowances cut, and her finances in dire straits, Chan sold her last gold bracelet for over RM300, and took a train to Singapore the following year to meet her husband. Unfortunately, he refused to accept her. She stayed behind to become a cabaret dancer at the Happy World, her husband's favourite haunt, in order to spite him.
She proved to be an accomplished dancer and as a result of her success, she was in great demand, and started dancing at as many as five cabarets at a time.
In 1951, Chan opened her own show, touring the whole of Malaya. The turning point of her career came unexpectedly the following year, and transformed her from a cabaret girl to the "Queen of Striptease" at the age of 27.
While performing at the Majestic Theatre in Ipoh, her brassiere snapped. Encouraged by the enthusiastic applause from the crowd, Chan decided to make stripping a permanent feature in her performances.
She shot to fame overnight and the "Striptease Queen" was born. But Chan was just as quick to earn the "Charity Queen" moniker. Even before her unexpected fame, she had started to do charitable work by dancing in aid of the Nanyang University Fund. Chan brought her striptease act to Kuala Lumpur, Penang, and Alor Star, always donating part of her proceeds to charity, benefiting children and old folks' homes, institutions for the blind, and tuberculosis patients.
Her daring stunts made her famous, and she took her act around the world, including to Germany, France, Britain, Australia, and Indonesia.
There was also a song composed in her honour, titled Rose, Rose, I love You.
In her later years, Chan was diagnosed with breast cancer. She died at age 62 at her home in Butterworth on May 26, 1987 and was interred at the Beow Hong Lim Columbarium in Air Itam, Penang.
 A typical show by Rose Chan would start with her singing and dancing.
A typical show by Rose Chan would start with her singing and dancing.

After a point, most relationships tend to lose their spark; that special something, and it becomes essential to bring it all back if you want the relationship to last. When a relationship is new, there is a certain enthusiasm that both the man and the woman feel, but after a few years the same moves and maneouvers between the sheets tend to become repetitive and boring. This usually is a stage that couples need to be wary of. If you let things be the way they are without any effort to bring back the romance, it may lead to ruining the relationship that you share with your special someone.

Dr Mahinder C Watsa, sexologist, says, "Couples should consciously make time for sex. Keeping the intimacy alive is important in every relationship."

There are times when just thinking of following the same routine makes a couple feel 'too bored' to get into the act. Watsa stresses on the importance of foreplay if one wants to pep up the sex life.

"For women especially, sex should be something that is very romantic and that can be pleasurable only when there is a lot of foreplay," says Sonali, a 28-year-old girl, who is in a relationship for the last four years. So, guys here are some simple things you need to keep in mind if you want to rev up the sex life with your girl. Read on to find out how you can do it...

A new scene
A change in scenery can change her mood to a great extent. Maybe you should rent a nice hotel room for a night.

Massage oils and candles
Light a few aromatherapy candles in you bedroom or bathroom (if it is big enough!). Give her a nice massage (you do not need a degree for this). Just make sure she is comfortable with whatever you are doing.

Slow things down
Linger on... make it last. Do not rush through sex to get it over with.

Do it together
Watch a nice mushy love-story together. Take a shower together. Spend sometime in the kitchen, maybe you will both end up cooking something delectable!

Compliment her
Always compliment your partner. Tell her how much you appreciate the little things she does for you. Mean all that you say. Positivity can ignite passion very well.

Try something new
Leave the lights on, use full-length mirrors. Explore ways to increase the intimacy levels. Don't be afraid to try new things in the bedroom. You don't eat the same food every day, so why stick with the same positions always? Try out something new. You may surprise your partner and yourself.

Ensure a romantic setting
You need to make sure that your bedroom is a romantic place. Think flowers, satin sheets.

Body language of desire: Use body language wisely to signal desire to a new partner. Run your fingers up and down your cocktail straw or slowly circle the rim of your glass. Or trace your fingertips leisurely from your neckline to decolletage — a green light to their subconscious that will give them confidence.

Pucker up: Tempt each other with sensational snogs. Kisses are pleasurable and produce oxytocin, the important bonding hormone. Try the 'medieval necklet' kiss, planting kisses from behind their ear, down their neck, around to their other ear. This stimulates nerve endings along sensitive erogenous zones.

Food of love: Having dinner at home means you can use ingredients that have an added aphrodisiac kick. A simple stir-fry becomes a sexy dish if you use ginger, garlic and chilli. These seasonings increase your circulation and that in turn sparks your desire. Spoon-feed each other dark chocolate dessert. It aids the release of feel-good chemicals like endorphins.

Show them the romance: Download or buy a CD of hits from the year your partner was born. You may not have known them long but this romantic gesture shows you are happy they came into the world.

Thrill-seekers: If confident in this lust-filled stage, go Fifty Shades and enjoy a sexy roleplay game using a blindfold and feather. If you don't have these to hand, use an airline mask, scarf or a stocking, plus a soft brush or anything faux fur. Take turns teasing, stroking and whispering to each other.

Make a memory: Take a flask and some lovely light bites to the best outdoors spot in town and watch the stars come out. Afterwards you can go for drinks, dinner or back to yours feeling all romantic.

Be playful: New couples need confidence to let go and being playful helps. Why not write down three things you would like to try and slip notes around your partner's belongings? It's a fantastic way to help your partner understand things you would like to try and visa versa.

A year down the line...
Mind your language: Long-term couples forget to use 'pleasure words' that people use when first dating. Instead of "Looking forward to tonight," say, "It's going to be lovely seeing you later." Telling a man he looks handsome is way better than "looking nice".

Spell it out: Leave a trail of notes to lead the way. Write the relevant letter of the alphabet on the back of each note so when put together they spell the special something you have planned. At the end of the trail to your candlelit bedroom, they will find you waiting with chilled drinks.

Reconnect with fun: Do something unexpected ever so often so that it creates the need for contact and throws you into each other's arms. For instance, go dancing. The spontaneous physical contact rekindles touch between couples.

Red-hot massage: Treat them to a Thai massage — rise up on your elbows and gently caress your body against theirs — with your tops off this technique will really set your skin tingling. Next, take a sexy massage technique into the shower. A face cloth can even be used, gently swirled in slow circular movements all over their body.

Sensual picnic: Host an indoor picnic. Make sure the kids are asleep and buy or make some simple but tempting finger foods. Throw down a blanket in your living room and snuggle up while you feed each other nibbles. It's fun and can lead to nibbles of your own.

Kitchen karma sutra: A candlelit dinner in the kitchen can be transformed into sizzling sex. After feeding each other by hand, don't bother going to the bedroom as you can couple up against the counter, over the table, on a chair or on the floor — the possibilities are endless in this versatile room.

Date with a difference: Established couples can bring on the romance by going back to the place you had your first date. Once there, have fun chatting about what first attracted you to each other — a kiss, a smile, giggling. Studies show taking a trip down memory lane rekindles warmth and romance.

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