UMNO's Datuk Ismail Kijo Sex drive, hot butt. Fired Up Over Lesbian Transgender (LGBT) community

"I wish I am a lesbian. It would be so much easier to be with a woman

The last straw could be something as absolutely cliché as driving around, lost, while your boyfriend or husband refuses to stop and ask for directions. Or noticing that you, not your husband, change the poopy diapers. Every single one of them.

"I wish I were a lesbian."

Ah, yes...Calgon, take me away from this brute hetero world, and plop me into a hot tub with awesome...women. Women are so thoughtful and sensitive. Women will rub your feet and listen to you talk about your childhood without their eyes glazing over. Women will make you a cup of hot chai and sit next to you on the porch swing, wearing chunky cable-knit sweaters and warm, understanding, empathetic smiles. And they don't mind stopping to ask for directions. If only you could get down with the va-jay-jay, you'd be so golden!Many women are just really, really straight. More than one woman has seen fit to share some variation of the following with me, since my own transition: "Women are beautiful and sexy, and I enjoy feminine energy, but nothing beats getting down and dirty with my man's junk." That's so awesome! Could you please pass the salt?They happen to be sexually fluid. That means that they can spend the first 25, 30, 40, 50 years of their lives identifying as straight. They aren't bi, or closeted. But bam...one day they meet a woman and have hot sexy feelings about her. Or maybe they have a wonderful, close friend, and something shifts; a sexual dimension enters the relationship and they fall in love and/or lust.This often happens as a woman's hetero relationship is winding down, or when a woman is already divorced. When everything you took for granted has gone up in smoke, it's a lot easier to imagine new possibilities and see where they lead.

It happened to me. I did some same-sex experimenting in college, but nothing lasting came of it. I dated men in my twenties and happily settled down with the man who became my husband. But seven years later, when we both admitted that our marriage was over, I was ready to really explore being with a woman. I put my profile on match.com, clicked "woman seeking women" and began to go to women's dances and events. A year later, I met my partner, Laura, and I've never looked back.

And so let me take a stab at separating myth from reality.

 Anti-gay and sexist jibes echoed from the speech box at the Umno General Assembly today, as one delegate kept with the general theme of deep conservatism at this year’s gathering by lashing out at sexual minorities.

Building his rhetoric around same-sex marriages and a unique interpretation of just how they might be confusing to onlookers, Datuk Ismail Kijo from Selangor Umno said Putrajaya must not give in to pressure to elevate sexual minorities to equality. 

“Malaysian mothers would be forced to face the harsh possibility that the partners of their daughters could have bigger breasts than them some day,” Ismail said of lesbian unions.

“G” is for generosity, both material and in spirit. Share your time, love, energy, compassion, knowledge openly and freely. Be a giver and also learn to receive happily from those that choose to give. G is also for gallant, something that seems to be losing its value in this age of equality. There is something incredibly charming and magical about a gallant, chivalrous man.

It may seem old fashioned, but some things never go out of style and it’s guaranteed to earn you many brownie points. G is also for grounding. As we grow older, we attain personal, professional and monetary power and it’s very easy to indulge in power play with domestic help, juniors or dependant family members. Remember they are as human as you and guidance, governance and protection is very different from controlling and trampling over the individuality of others. Ground yourself with goodness and humbleness.

 30-year-old woman and in love with a guy who is 31. We have been dating each other for a while now but haven’t been able to take it further because he refuses to speak to me about the same. What should I do?

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