Saturday, February 9, 2013

For great sex it's Valentine's Day

his butt worshiping set look like screen shots from a private sex video... Pics are interesting enough to wish we had the video. Lets hope someone can share it with us because we want to see more round Asian ass in action. Enjoy! Sex may end between the sheets, but that's certainly not where it begins. Experts tell you what to do for a spunkier sex life... 

Scented candles? Check. Kamasutra series? Check. Flavoured condoms? Double check! The paraphernalia is in place, and boy, you were never more ready. It begins with foreplay, slips into intercourse, and before you know bam it's over — as physical as it could get and as unfulfilling as you would dread. Setting up the supplies is only the icing. What's needed primarily is that passion for each other, which sadly isn't enough. Here's what you can do to increase the satisfaction quotient of your next encounter. 

Do the karaoke 
Sing to your partner. It might be embarrassing to some, way too mushy for others, and old-fashioned for most, but sorry dude, it works. So head to the nearest Karaoke night, and let your hearts out with romantic duets. You needn't do a Kishore Kumar or Asha Bhonsle, but the warm numbers will re-ignite the passion which is often muddled in everyday madness. 

Head to the kitchen 
Don the chef's hat and help her cook. Lick the chilli sauce off each other's fingers and show off some whipping (whipping cream, that is) skills. Don't be surprised if you skip desserts and head straight to bed. 

Click it right 
Revisit those cherished moments by going through family albums and videos. That special date (when you first kissed), that evening by the seaside (when he finally proposed), your engagement ceremony (when your friends couldn't stop dancing) will remind you how special your partner is. This feeling of togetherness and emotional intimacy will ultimately manifests in physical attraction. 

Travel time 
It's time to put those leaves to good use. Check out travel brochures, browse the net and plan your next holiday. And lack of funds should not be an excuse. The good old Ganpatiphule can work as good as a Paris or a Barcelona. The shared experience will only bring you closer. By this you will realise that you still dig each other's company and enjoy it the most. 

Comic quotient 
Humour is good for health and those light-hearted moments drain out stress, if any — just the right mood to switch in to some fun. 

Catch a stand-up comic show or order that rib-tickling DVD to watch after dinner. If not that, get a book and read out those ridiculous jokes to each other. 

What can be sexier than showing off those muscles as you work up a good sweat? Go for a jog, swim or cycle. The workout will help release endorphins; the feel-good hormones that will gear you up for a longer lasting session. And of course, a toned body means your partner will only be more than happy to help you show more of it. 

Dance baby dance 
You don't need to be a perfect dancer or even know various dance forms for this. Just hold your partner and slow dance to your favourite song. The lyrics will play cupid as the bodies rub against each other, the fragrance of her hair will work as the most potent aphrodisiac you ever knew of. 

Play with each other 
Play cards or challenge each other for a board game. The rules remain the same, barring one small anomaly — the winner's wish is the loser's command. The adrenaline levels will soar as the game approaches its nail-biting finish. But the real fun will only be after the game is over. 

Do 'nothing' together 
Cuddle on a comfortable sofa with an endless supply of starters and chilled drinks. The endless chats about anything and everything will help you appreciate each other's company. When both partners feel valued and loved, the connect goes deeper, and more meaningful. It is only out of such pleasant moments that true physical intimacy develops.

At the start, couples just can't seem to get enough of each other. But after a few years into the marriage, is it the same story? Rachel Fernandes gets the experts to explain 

Wondering what's ailing your once rocking sexlife post marriage? It could be the marriageitself. Yes, according to a recent survey, the very fact that they are married can take a toll on a couple's sex life. In the survey, conducted on 3,000 married people, it was found that their sex lives did not remain the same after a few years into the marriage. Researchers found that though, initially, couples can expect to have sex more than four times a week, after three years of life as man and wife, most couples are lucky to have sex just once every seven days. 

Up to one third of the married people interviewed admitted that they no longer fancied their partner as much as they did in the early days and a whopping 43 per cent even claimed that their loved one had let themselves go. It also emerged six out of ten couples believe marriage has completely ruined the excitement of having sex. Under half of all married people said their relationship with their partner is more that of friends than lovers. 

The poll shows 59 per cent of couples believe their sex life has worsened since marriage because they no longer make an effort with each other any more and a third no longer fancy their partner as much as they did in the early days. Unfortunately, eight in ten couples admitted to being in a sexual rut - having sex at the same time, in the same place and in the same positions every time they sleep together. In fact, 79 per cent of people are happier getting a good night's sleep than making the effort to have spontaneous sex in the middle of the night. Two thirds of couples blamed their hectic lifestyle for their terrible sex life and 80 per cent claimed they were often too tired to bother about any 'action between the sheets' once the day was over. Seven in ten people also admitted that they might be inclined to make love more often if their partner made more of an effort romantically. 

"Unfortunately, while you can be deeply in love with someone and want to spend the rest of your life with them, it is also possible to want more from the relationship. A partner might be supportive, funny, intelligent, and kind, but if they don't inspire confidence in the bedroom, or don't meet expectations sexually, life can be frustrating," a spokesman of the study was quoted saying. 

Dr Minnu R Bhonsle, psychotherapist and counsellor attributes the decline in couples sex lives to two basic factors - either emotional distancing or physical fatigue. "If it's a case of emotional distancing, it's mainly because of accumulated issues that have remained unresolved. Hence, the partner doesn't feel connected to the other and stops responding to the his/her overtures. As for physical fatigue it could be due to a variety of reasons - fatigue at work, tiredness trying to maintain a balance between work, home and kids. As a result, fatigue overrides their sex life." 

"Most young people are seized with a wrong notion that sex life is different from marriage. In reality, sexual relationship is essential and a healthy part of a marriage. Sex needs commitment and connectivity and that is where most young people find themselves lacking the adequate energy or inclination," opines Dr Rajiv Anand, marriage counsellor. According to him, it is not the sexual act that loses novelty or attraction after marriage but the approach of the people involved. 

So what's the solution? "If it's a case of physical fatigue, couples should engage in scheduled sex. They must plan weekend getaways or make arrangements to leave the child with a babysitter or relatives and plan a night out where they could probably get home early from work and then just concentrate on spending time with each other. If it's an issue of emotional distancing, communication is the only solution. Couples need to talk things out with each other in a non-toxic way," says Dr Minnu. 

Dr Anjali Chhabria, psychiatrist and psychotherapist opines that it is more important to get down to the root cause of the issue than just search for quick fix solutions. "Sex is an important part of marriage and the lack of it could indicate issues in the marriage. A declining sex life is a symptom, it's just the tip of the iceberg. One needs to find answers to why there is no sex? Is it because there is no chemistry in the relationship or is there no relationship at all? Are the partners too tired or stressed out? Does one partner feel that she or he is no longer attractive to the other? Is one'sspouse attracted to someone else? If it's just boredom, couples need to make sex a priority. If they are too tired to have sex at night, do it in the morning. If lack of privacy is the issue, couple need to make time for themselves. Most importantly, couples need to tell each other what they want. Your partner is not a magician to magically figure out your wants and needs," she explains. 

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