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Katy Perry kissed a girl and she liked it. Britney Spears kissed Madonna and the whole world liked it. And when Natalie Portman threw herself upon Mila Kunis in that exceedingly passionate scene in the Oscar-nominated movie Black Swan, audiences pushed pause and gaped. These occurrences seem to have become fairly commonplace too, as a new term has been coined for women like them who have no qualms in indulging in some spirited lip-play (and more) with those of the same sex and yet, refuse to be tied down by their sexual preferences. Make way for the flexisexual woman!
The term flexisexuality has been coined for the burgeoning number of straight women who flirt with bisexuality, but refuse to be bound by it. These women can also be termed heteroflexible, pansexual or queer — all pointing to the fact that they are keeping their options open. "It is all thanks to pop-culture!" points out student Nayanika Bhatt, "If Katy Perry can kiss a girl and make a hit song out of it, then why can't the everyday-girl? I have girl pals who have kissed other girls just for the heck of it — they loved it too, no strangeness at all. And it was no big deal, they still have their boyfriends."
Flexisexual women constantly alter which gender they are more attracted to. "And a large part of this can be attributed to the fact that we women now have the money and confidence to handle the consequences if we decide to have a mindless romp with someone of the same sex," shrugs designer Deepika B, "While in the global context, women are doing it to explore their bodies, in India, when women display same-sex intimacy in public, it is merely to catch the attention of the men."
The coining of the term comes hot on the heels of numerous celebrity endorsements that hail that one does not need to be gay to have same-sex contact. However, artist Sunaina Rai (name changed on request) effuses, "Girls with guts have always been experimenting, but thanks to umpteen celebrity examples, many girls now have started playing around simply to be with 'it'. Which kind of takes away from the purpose of the term. If I kiss a girl, it is because I am attracted to her as a person, and not her gender. That is why I am flexisexual and not bisexual."
Sociologist Rashmi says, "While displaying these tendencies might not be the wisest of ideas in Chennai, social climes are changing and girls want to have some mindless fun on the side. There have been studies which show that a woman is more fluid in terms of her sexuality, but flexisexual girls will ultimately end up with men, and happily so too, once the current fad dies down." Then, there are those who find this practice completely unacceptable. "And downright disrespectful too," fumes college lecturer Raji Prasad, "Sexuality isn't something to be played around with — this behaviour might even be offensive to the gay community. Girls should decide what they want and stick to it; not make a mockery of themselves and the community."
The term flexisexuality has been coined for the burgeoning number of straight women who flirt with bisexuality, but refuse to be bound by it. These women can also be termed heteroflexible, pansexual or queer — all pointing to the fact that they are keeping their options open. "It is all thanks to pop-culture!" points out student Nayanika Bhatt, "If Katy Perry can kiss a girl and make a hit song out of it, then why can't the everyday-girl? I have girl pals who have kissed other girls just for the heck of it — they loved it too, no strangeness at all. And it was no big deal, they still have their boyfriends."
Flexisexual women constantly alter which gender they are more attracted to. "And a large part of this can be attributed to the fact that we women now have the money and confidence to handle the consequences if we decide to have a mindless romp with someone of the same sex," shrugs designer Deepika B, "While in the global context, women are doing it to explore their bodies, in India, when women display same-sex intimacy in public, it is merely to catch the attention of the men."
The coining of the term comes hot on the heels of numerous celebrity endorsements that hail that one does not need to be gay to have same-sex contact. However, artist Sunaina Rai (name changed on request) effuses, "Girls with guts have always been experimenting, but thanks to umpteen celebrity examples, many girls now have started playing around simply to be with 'it'. Which kind of takes away from the purpose of the term. If I kiss a girl, it is because I am attracted to her as a person, and not her gender. That is why I am flexisexual and not bisexual."
Sociologist Rashmi says, "While displaying these tendencies might not be the wisest of ideas in Chennai, social climes are changing and girls want to have some mindless fun on the side. There have been studies which show that a woman is more fluid in terms of her sexuality, but flexisexual girls will ultimately end up with men, and happily so too, once the current fad dies down." Then, there are those who find this practice completely unacceptable. "And downright disrespectful too," fumes college lecturer Raji Prasad, "Sexuality isn't something to be played around with — this behaviour might even be offensive to the gay community. Girls should decide what they want and stick to it; not make a mockery of themselves and the community."
Stop telling single people why they are not married. If you are so sure that becoming unsingle is the ultimate and tyrannically powerful life goal of most single people, you probably believe a lot of other things about singles that just aren't true. It's time for some debunking.
Here are the top 10 myths about people who are single. For some of them, I'll provide just a brief version, with a link to the more detailed dethroning. about single people is that if you are single, you are interested in just one thing: getting coupled. Single people, according to the myth, are home crying in their beer, distraught that they don't have a sweetie. You can think that, as long as you never ask singles what they want. But those pesky social scientists are always asking questions. When they asked a national sample of single people, in 2005 and again in 2010, whether they were looking to get married, fewer than half said yes! Younger people are more likely to say they are looking, but they get over it. The unmarried people who are least likely to say that they want to get married are the ones who already tried it: those who are divorced or widowed. In later life, men are always more eager to get remarried than women are, but even for them, if they have good support for friends, then they are no more interested in signing on again than are women. Now let me tell you about a category of single people you may not have heard about: people, like me, who are single at heart. For the single at heart, being single is who we really and truly are. We are not people who are "unlucky in love" or afraid of getting rejected or any of those other dopey stereotypes. We are not "marking time" until we find "the one." We just love our single lives. We love striking just the right balance between the time we spend with other people and the time we spend in sweet solitude. We love pursuing our passions. Single is who we are.
A conversation with someone you just met at a pub could turn intimate and there are chances that you might even get lucky if things turn a little romantic. And, if a recent study is to be believed, one-night stands are increasingly turning into meaningful relationships.
Many surveys have suggested that the quality of a relationship is better for individuals who wait for things to get serious before having sex, in comparison to the those who become sexually involved right at the start. However, this new study found that a woman who is involved with a friend is 44 % more likely to stay committed and as for the men, the likelihood increases by 25%. If the same people were to get involved with a stranger or acquaintance, the odds increase by 30% for women and 43% for men.
Many surveys have suggested that the quality of a relationship is better for individuals who wait for things to get serious before having sex, in comparison to the those who become sexually involved right at the start. However, this new study found that a woman who is involved with a friend is 44 % more likely to stay committed and as for the men, the likelihood increases by 25%. If the same people were to get involved with a stranger or acquaintance, the odds increase by 30% for women and 43% for men. 
"To have a meaningful relationship out of a one-night stand is absolutely wishful thinking and many people are in denial," says Sanjana, a graduate and regular party-goer, "A one-night stand can be dangerous as it increases the chances of contracting sexually transmitted diseases — not the best thing to happen, especially when one is merely looking for fun." 
The 'friends with benefits' concept has also been in existence for long, and although it is based on sexual gratification, which can be temporarily fulfiling, a mature mind stops one from being part of the game. 
Rhea, a visual artist, who believes in being sexually experimental, says, "Having sex with random men gives one a liberated feel initially. But the down side of this behaviour is that after some time, it backfires and gives one a feeling of worthlessness. In some ways, it's like abusing and disrespecting your body." However, she was the one who met her mate in the most casual of circumstances. She met a Canadian national over a drink, they got talking, exchanged stories and are now in love. "It was such a beautiful feeling. We haven't made love yet and I'm in no hurry as I've never felt this way before," she says, "It may not be a one-night stand, but if the chemistry we share is good, there's nothing stopping us from going ahead and getting into a relationship." So, it appears that the study does have some relevance even in our country.
Psychologist Sudha says, "Couples who become sexually involved with friends or acquaintances and are open to serious relationships could end up just as happy as those who date and wait." 
However, Rhea might have been lucky, and although a random hook-up at a bar does have the potential to turn into a passionate relationship, some relationship experts say it's not really the best idea. Clinical psychologist, Seema Hingorrani says, "Often, sexual intimacy leads the couple to believe that they can have a good relationship as well. But later, feelings of guilt creep in. In situations like this, it's best to tread carefully as it affects the lives of several people." MORE PICTURES Sex video clip of a couple in Malaysia Flexisexuality, the latest buzz in town Myths About Single People and One-night stands
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